Thursday 20 September 2012

Gosh!!! I'm engaged?????


[Prologue : Here 'Me' is the evil side of Rino that sometimes pops-up in her mind and scoffs at her good side and makes her think up evil things in her head. None of this was said out loud, but still good Rino apologizes if anybody's sentiments/ feelings were hurt....(Evil Rino lifts up a huge dictionary and thwacks Good Rino's head with it - "That should take care of you for sometime") ]

13th June 2012

6.00am: 
Rrrr-- Rinnnnnnnng Rrrr-- Rinnnnnnnng
Me: What the heck is that noise...  :( :(  Grrrrr... it's that annoying alarm clock... Somebody please flush it away... Oh nooooooooo wait... It's the alarm on my dear mobile ... toooo deary to be flushed away. ]

 Hands find the snooze button and normalcy returns in Rino's wonderland finally. Sigh!

6.10am: 
Wake-up! Wake-up! Wake-up!
 [ Me: Why? Why? Why? ]

6.11am: 
Have a bath n be ready... the beautician will be here at exact 7.30 am.. Come-on! Come-on! Come-on!
Me: How does Mum always know what evil Rino is up to...  :O  ]

Open an eye-lid to just measure the magnitude of Mum's wrath  and if i could still catch (steal) a few winks.. ;)

6.15am:
 Feel a strong tremble.... the bed seems to rock..
[Me: Earthquake! Earthquake! Earthquake!]
But it was just Mum doing her best to wake me up on time :/

I am nudged and pushed  into the bathroom to take a shower!
[ Me: What does a person need to do to get some peaceful sleep around here... Uffff :/  ]

7.30am: 
I step out of the shower and the beautician is at the door.
Me: Wow! Bang on time.. Seems these people are the only ones who do not follow IST ( Indian slow time.. ;) ]

7.35am: 
Mum serves milk and carrots. [Me: Ewwww ]
Don't ask me how i did it.. But i managed to gobble up the carrots and drain them down with the glass of milk in one shot.

Meanwhile, the stylist  had gotten to drying my hair...

8.00 am: 
Half an hour and my hair still looked tousled.. The stylist was hard at work to keep my unruly hair in place.
Me: Poor lady!.. Today you have to deal with the life-time crisis of trying to get  these wild locks in place. Muhahahahaha.. :/  ]

8.05am: 
The stylist gives up on my hair and started working on my face.

8.45am: 
After countless strokes of greasepaint, eye-shadows, blushes, eye-liners and an enormous number of bottled-things ( that i m not familiar with ) gets emptied on my face - I'm finally allowed to take a peek at myself in the mirror..

[Me: What!.. I'm clown-white..Is this how it should be..?????. Somebody Help! Help!.. Get me a huge dictionary again.... :/  ]

The neighbors and friends who had dropped by to catch a glimpse of the 'Cinderella in making' all nodded an approval and claimed that the bride-to-be looked absolutely stunning. The compliments lit up fairy godmother's (stylist) face and she hustled around giving finishing touches to her masterpiece..leaving me completely baffled. :/

9.00am: 
Now came the draping of the Saree.. and the moment i had been dreading the most.
[Me: How the hell am i going to carry this 20 pound Saree the entire day.. :( :(  Oh ... please ... please ... secure it up with as many safety pins as possible. I never thought a Saree would scare the hell out of me! :/  ]

9.45 am:
The finishing touches were done, including lot of hairspray to  keep my hair in place.

10.00 am:
Its getting late!! Come-on Come-on Come-on!
[Me: what.??? Its not till 10.45.. And the venue is just 5 min drive away.. Whats all this hurry about... Grrrrrrr..]

10.10 am: 
We reached the venue. [Me: Huh! there's nobody to even welcome me.. :/  ]
And the plight began... as i had encountered the first set of stairs, I have never hated stairs so much in my life. I had to tread the stairs knock kneed praying that i do not trip on the Saree with my 2-inch high heals.
[Me: You can do it... just five steps.. four to go.. three....oh.. wait slowdown..careful...  two...one... yooohooo.. done!!! Thank God... that's over for now..:)]

10.15 am: 
The photographer comes running and requests me to climb up the stairs again so he can capture it for the video of my arrival
[Me: Are you crazy???? And why do you think i need a video of me walking like Charlie Chaplin ???? Do you think this is a moment I would like to remember.....:/  ]

But since I was warned to remain in my bridal demure for the entire day- I had to politely oblige the photographer to capture my awkward moments of faltering over the stairs like a baby starting on her first steps. Sigh!

10:30 am: 
I enter the auditorium and a few heads turn and i hear a murmur through the small crowd of the grooms relatives
[Me: Better say good things about me... or should i warn you about the dictionary that may come your way! ]

10:45am: 
The ceremony started. We were made to stand for the prayers - which seemed to go on forever.
[Me: I have heard this prayer song all through my childhood days.. But it used to be so short and 
sweet..why the hell is it taking so long today???? Has the priest decided to add a few more verses to 
the song just because i knocked out good Rino for a couple of hours.. Huh! ]

11.05 am: 
Finally the prayers ended and the time came to sit down to exchange the rings - never in life i had to sit down cross-legged while wearing a Saree...and with a thousand eyes watching you , the task just seemed even more impassable. I shut my eyes and just plonked down, but i landed in a very awkward half sitting position because of the Saree...
 [Me: God ... please don't make anybody notice this.. I would be the next joke of the millennium.]
But curse the digital media these days - its everywhere on Facebook and even in my engagement album and the videos...and just like my stumbling walk my graceless posture to was made a Kodak moment for generations to revel. Sigh!
 [Me :For those of you who failed to notice it, dare you rush to FB to check it out.. I'm all set and ready with the dictionary  :/  )

The engagement rings were placed in front of us and i instantly had butterflies in my stomach.. Of course not because of the thought of being engaged -that hadn't struck me yet.
 [ Me : What if the ring slipped and fell out of my butterfingers ?? Would there be a hushed silence followed by the gasped looks , hushed tones murmuring 'Apshakun' (bad omen) , with the camera highlighting the panicked looks on my parents face.] Hmmmm... i know Ekta Kapoor serial effect.. : P

Thankfully we had no problem in getting the rings on as they were totally loose for our fingers as we both had lost a few pounds. Yeay! (Every ounce of fat lost is a matter of joy- who cares whether the rings fits you or not.. :D )

We waited for the priest to finish off the concluding rituals so we would be back on our feet. Though i had managed to put on a patient face, it was fun to watch hubby-to-be being totally restless to stand up again. At least we were in it together - already following the norms of marriage - 'to be with each other in sickness and in health' i guess! :P

1:00 pm: 
We were still greeting the guests who had come to bless us, but i swear my jaws were totally stiff from trying to give that perfect pose with every guest and the growling tummy was not helping either.
Finally the last guest had wished us and it was time for me to hog like a pig, but the photographers whisked us away for some candid couple photographs.
Me: Really...  candid photos??? I am tired .. Please somebody find me some Food! Food! Food! ]

1:45 pm:
Finally i had the plate in my hand and off i went piling it up with the yummy food. I was just about to take my first bite and the photographs came hustling to get a shot of us feeding each other.
Me: Have some mercy guys!! Please!! ]
But the pleading looks did not dither them so we had to oblige.

2:30 pm:
Everything was done and it was time to pack up and go home , get rid of the Saree and the excess amount of hair spray out of my hair - which had still left my hair to look like i had just been electrocuted.
Me: Ohhhh!! This event has really shaken me up! Need to go into exile for a few days... Phew!! ]

Well so it took me 3 months, countless texts/calls asking me 'You getting married so early??' (to which i hotly reply 'Chill guys... there is still time... :/  ' ) and burning a huge hole in my pocket from giving engagement treats (to the evil ones celebrating my misery .. :/ ) and this post to  realize - Gosh! I am engaged ???? 

P.S: Though i missed all my near and dear ones (with who i share a blood relationship ) as they couldn't make it to the ceremony, I thank my other near and dear ones- the ones who held my hands and took me to school, the ones who prayed when i got sick or was about to give an exam, the ones who took care of me when Mum was out of town, the ones with whom i dreamt of marrying that perfect guy, the ones who taught me to bunk classes, the ones who celebrate when i ace a test or crack an interview.... Thank-you  uncles, aunties and all my friends for always being there for me -  you guys will actually make the Germans who coined the proverb 'Blood is thicker than Water' run for their money... :D

Hmmm... curious about the guy who is to take me as his wife,.... ummmmm well doesn't he deserve a whole new post ?? *winks* 

(Also I'll need to devise a way to block him from reading that post. Hehehe :D )

11 comments :

  1. :) :) ... For me it was just Butterflies in the whole body from the start till the end :) :) ... But it was worth it .. :)

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  2. lol.........nice one...............but 6:15 to 7:30 ....itna kya bath......gulab ki pankhudiyon mei naha rahi thi :P

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    1. I don't like to document everything.. :P

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  3. nice.. btw, would like to see the walking like Charlie Chaplin video :D

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    1. Do you think i'll ever show you that.. :P

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  4. :) Was a fun read.. And yes!! We want to see a whole new post on Mr. Rino.. ;)

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    1. Thanks Shruti!! :):) You already know Mr. Rino ;)

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  5. Once again an Amazing read Rino... I wait for you to blog now so that I can read and just smile :) - Shraddha Shetty

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    1. Woa... :) That's a real honour dear!! Thanks a lot ! :):)

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  6. This is lovely read rino...too gud:)

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